August 2006 Archives

Mom had her surgery yesterday -- it was to replace her knee replacement. Her knee replacement was 20 years old and down to the metal, so it was time for a new one, as she was in a great deal of pain.

The surgery went okay -- there were some complications, ones we were prepared for and ones we weren't. The complications = a longer recovery time for my mother and possibly a lesser degree of bend in the new knee. >:/ We all knew this was going to be a complex surgery (see yesterday's entry), so.

Her surgeon later asked me, as an aside, "Your mother mentioned her husband's death while going under sedation...it sounded pretty recent." "Uh, no, it was almost six years ago." "Oh! The way she was speaking, it sounded like it had just happened..." "Well, she's had a difficult adjustment -- to her, it feels like it did just happen."

: sigh :

I saw my retinologist this morning, so I'm running around looking like "Anime Roe" -- my eyes are all pupil, basically black. My doc says my retinas are in good shape, considering (I'm horribly nearsighted and I've previously torn my retina), so I am a happy girlie. Only catch is that I'm doing a mighty fine Mr. Magoo impression -- my pupils are so dilated that I can't really read. I'm virtually doing this entry by Braille. :D

My mother is having surgery tomorrow -- they're replacing her knee replacement -- so fingers crossed, please. She already has a hip replacement in that leg; when they did that operation there were some complications -- they put the replacement in, but her bone fractured, so they had to do it again with a longer implant. A trauma surgeon will be in the OR tomorrow to assist. Yes, the family's nervous.

More tomorrow night, after I'm home...

This past weekend, we had The Camping Trip That Wasn't. One of my friends from high school organized a camping trip. We were headed for a campground in upstate New York, six adults and my friend's three-year-old, and everyone was quite stoked. It would have been my first "real" camping trip (my only other camp experience involved Girl Souts, my troop leader's backyard, and spraining my ankle by tripping on a tent peg) so I was all bouncy and asking R fun questions like, "Hey, how do you pee in the woods? Do you need to bring toilet paper and a baggie?" R was an Eagle Scout, so he'd know, right?!

We were all meeting up Friday night: three of us were coming from Long Island, and the other three from Manhattan. R and I had even purchased a tent, sleeping bags, and a lantern for the event -- we were prepared, baby -- so we were blissfully determined to be blissfully ignorant and ignore the weather, which was calling for some rain showers.

Late Friday afternoon, however, we got the call: "Major rain and thunderstorms all weekend. We're switching to Plan B. Abandon your tents!" "Plan B" involved our friend's mother's "getaway" cabin in the Poconos -- very rustic, on the border of a huge state park, but not quite the "roughing it" weekend we'd envisioned. However, we had a thunderstorm and monsoon-level rain within three hours after we'd arrived, so we knew we'd made the right decision. It pretty much stayed that way all weekend -- we didn't even get to see the park. It was still fun, though, as we all got to reconnect and chat. We cooked, we drank, we played poker and Trivial Pursuit. Thanks to R and L.L. Bean, we even made ice cream. It was all good -- and thank heavens for the getaway cabin, for which we were all eternally grateful, and happily dry. (And if any of the fab six are reading this, massive hugs! Don't forget "Connect Fo'!")

I still don't know how you pee in the woods, though. >:/ Maybe next year!

It's never a good sign when one's bus keeps stalling out in the middle of traffic. That's like God giving you multiple chances to go home and pull the covers over your head, 'cause it's gonna be that kind of day.

And it just might be, too. I have a five-hour meeting today with my entire department plus our president. I'll definitely be doing my pre-meeting chant. Hell, if things get too bad, I'll do it during the meeting and use a few stuffed animals as props...

I just realized how crummy my body copy looks in Internet Explorer. Sorry about that, folks. Until I get the chance to fix it, please view my happy happy site in Firefox, Opera, or Flock. :)

Went out and saw "Free to be Friends" last night. It's a spoof of "Free to be You and Me" and "The Magic Garden" (remember Carol and Paula?). Totally, totally hysterical -- if you have a chance to see either one of these women, do. Three cheers for the Enchanted Patio!

...and already my brain hurts. I can take another three weeks, right? :)

End of the holiday was good; it included a trip to the zoo, work in our apartment, and dinners with friends. Yay! Pictures up...uh...someday. :D

It's R's mother's birthday tomorrow, and we need to be up and out in the morning to go see her. Since I am the girl in this relationship, I am the Wrapper of All Presents (TM), and since I had a frozen cappucino at dinner, I was happily wrapping away at 3:15 am. Wide! Awake!

Except. Except! Evil store put a price tag on a DVD that, when peeled off, left cruddy sticky residue. A huge square of it. On the front cover, even. And, fine, it will come off when they unwrap the DVD from its plastic-wrapped security blanket, but still -- it looked awful. I reached for the Goo Gone, but realized that we don't have any. I contemplated going to the store (Manhattan, 24 hours, city never sleeps, love) but, eh, 3:00 am, not so much. R wouldn't thank me if I got mugged while getting Goo Gone. ("Goo Gone, and my wallet gone, too!") So I had to think.

Now, typically (pre Goo Gone) if you have a little bit of sticky residue, you rub your finger on the oil on your nose and rub the oil on the residue and it comes off. (If you didn't know this, now you do.) So what did I have that had oil? Hand lotion, body lotion...hair lotion. Brilliantine, to be exact, which has coconut oil in it. Hmmmm....yes.

It took ten minutes, but it did come off, and R's mother has a coconut-scented DVD waiting for her tomorrow. Won't R be confused when the present smells like my hair... :)

So a judge in the Phillipines got sacked because he told investigators that three mystic dwarves -- Armand, Luis and Angel -- had helped him to carry out healing sessions during breaks in his chambers.

Three mystic dwarves. Really, what more is there to say?

OK, I'm back. My tooth is fixed and shiny-new -- no red wine or other stainy things for 24 hours, though. I have other visits scheduled, which is okay -- I really did mean to get some scheduled while on vacation; apparantly some higher power decided to nudge me and make SURE I got it done.

What happened? I had some bonding done years back; it broke off a little this past November, so I had it repaired at a different dentist. It's been feeling a little funny for the past week or so -- not painful, just funny. I was having the last bite of my dinner last night and -- snap! -- there it went. One side of my tooth was translucent; just the front wall was left, so I definitely had to go today. I'm grateful my dentist was able to get me in.

The "insane" part -- so I was running quickly through iTunes and saw "All by myself," by Eric Cartman. I freaked. "When did Cartman do that?!" I went to go play it -- I didn't remember it at all, much less how it got in my iTunes -- and realized it was by Eric Carmen, not Eric Cartman. Too bad. So sad.

Would've been a good cover, too. ;)

* Ahem. * Apparantly, vacation will also include a trip to the dentist, to fix my BROKEN FRONT TOOTH.

: growls :

My dentist is very nice, I just didn't want to see her this week.

R and I are on vacation this week, so we've been bopping around with friends and solo. Fun stuff has included dinner at Mara's Homemade, a good Southern spot and dessert at Chikalicous, an amazing dessert bar in the Village. We've brought almost everyone we know there. We love. :) We were also at a barbeque in NJ yesterday, yay!

Tonight was my last night of photography class -- now I just need to apply all the theory I've learned. Gah!

Stopped in at Midtown Comics today. Very nice, very organized, but a little too superhero/Marvel/D.C. oriented. There's some indie representation, but not as much as I'd prefer. Jim Hanley's Universe still holds first place in my heart!

Me and R were lying in bed this morning, and I was telling him about the doofy dreams I had last night...

Me: And I had this rocket launcher, and they wanted me to hit this thing with it...
R: Oh, God. The thought of you with a rocket launcher...
Me: HEY! I'd love to have a rocket launcher some days!
R: You'd paint smiley faces on all the shells...
Me: Of course!
R: ...and you'd never hit anything. "Boom!" "Shit -- missed it!" "Boom!" "Fuck!" "Boom!" "Damnit, missed again -- oh, but look at the sparkles!"
Me: Grrrrrr....okay, mister, get out of the bed. NOW.

:D Truth is? Wouldn't a rocket launcher with pink glitter smiley faces on it be the coolest thing ever? * squee! *

A gentleman called me today, regarding a correction in a publication. He was very nervous when he first got on -- didn't seem sure of what to say -- so I asked him how I could help him.

"Well, first of all, are you the person I was connected to?"

...

"Yes. Yes, I am. How can I help you?"

So I'm on the subway this morning...it's packed...and I'm late, so I have to squeeze on. I stand in the middle, which means I get to see everybody. I'm half-asleep and grumpy, having just gotten off the crosstown bus.

Thoughts go like this: "Man, it's crowded. It's really crowded. And someone bathed in cologne. And it's clashing with mine. Oh, look at that guy. Older, yet still cute...conservative...khakis...man, I hate khakis. They always remind me of "Welcome to Blockbuster, may I help you?" Anyway...oh, and he's got a red messenger bag...with...buttons on it. Pins. Tiny ones. One of which says, "What up, Nutnut?" Um. Hrm. Why? I mean, I'm immature, and I'm not even doing little buttons. Maybe he's younger than me after all. Fine, moving on..."

"Oooh. Oooh. Dude, stop doing that. Stop doing that! STOP -- eugh, stop ITCHING YOUR FACE. Can't look. Must look. Can't look! Hey, if I close my eyes, I won't have to see it and maybe he'll get off at the next stop or he'll just stop. By closing my eyes, I will make him stop itching his face. Okay, one, two, three... hmmmm hmmmmm...la la la la....la? Did he stop? It looks like he di-NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"OK, FINE, I'll stare at the ceiling. The list of subway stops! Always good to stare at intently. Hey...why is there a cigarette hole at 59th street? Does someone have something against Bloomingdale's? Did they try to stub it out and erase its evil ways? Weird. OK, three more stops. Just three more and...NO. Aw c'mon, man, I've only got three more stops. I don't WANT to hear a banjo. I have a HEADACHE, it's morning, it is NOT a good banjo time for me, nor for anyone else, since no one is clapping."

: whimper : "Someone, please stop the banjo?"

OK, I'm back. Did'ja miss me? :)

Things are not totally final over here; the main page looks okay, but the archive pages still need fixin', the "about" page needs to be written, and there's all sorts of little things that I need to take care of. But still, it feels good to be back here. "UltraMegaWow," while nifty, never really felt like "me."

All of the "UltraMegaWow" entries are here -- everything from 2004 on. My oldest old "Metrocake" entries are not -- while the entries from 1999-2003 are not gone forever, they're down from the site for now. I'm a different person, in love with a different person, and while some of the entries were hilarious, many were pretty painful. (The funny ones may make their way back someday!) Fresh starts are good, ya know?

* sparkle! *

Just go read this. Then send it to everyone you know.

ConEd -- Manhattan's power supplier -- is urging all business and residents on the East Side to power down unessential appliances. Apparantly they're having some problems with the power lines. We've already been told that we may have no power to the office building later today -- in which case, SNOW DAY! In August, no less.

On the other hand, "snow day" in 104-degree weather (112-degrees with the heat index)? Not so fun. I'll stare at my blizzard pictures and look at a real snow day!

This comic strip says it all.

The air conditioning is mostly broken in my office...today is gonna SUCK. >:/

Yo. So flip-flops have been forbidden footwear in our office this year, which blows. Done right, they are some of the cutest summer shoes, after all.

Anyway, everyone's been wearing them to and from the office, and changing into "other shoes" upon arrival. Today, however, I have chosen to ban the ban: I have been wearing my flip-flops ALL DAY! Call it my little personal act of rebellion, but not so much: I've been sneaking around the office, trying to walk quietly and not make that unavoidable "whop whop" sound one wears when wearing flip-flops. C'est impossible. And so I'm looking like one giant DOOFUS while trying to be all stealth.

Hey, we've got a heat index of 104 degrees out, and our office air-conditioner is running at only 2/3 capacity -- it's like a swamp in here. So clearly the heat has gotten to me. I'll start hearing "White Rabbit" any minute now, and start running around the cubicle maze muttering, "The horror...the horror..."